需求产生爱。
Need gives rise to love.
董利钢 著 · 插画 Tianci Dong
Wuzhen: Reflections
修炼身心，完善自我。
中正平和，无为而治。
第一章
CHAPTER 01没有一样真本事是可以速成的。
反复修正和练习是必不可少的，
但不可太过努力。
No real skill can be acquired overnight. Repeated practice and correction are essential, but do not push yourself too hard.
人的问题，
归根结蒂是心理问题，
这是我2000年前后说的。
Human problems ultimately come down to the mind. I was saying this around the year 2000.
我就是我，
没有必要与别人一样，
不要害怕误会和代价。
I am who I am. There is no need to be like anyone else. Do not fear being misunderstood, or the price of being yourself.
插画 · 作者之女
Illustration · The author’s daughter
人都喜欢听假话，
我有时也说假话，
觉得可耻，
但也无奈。
People like to hear lies. Sometimes I tell them too. I feel ashamed, but also helpless.
运动是排忧的良药。
Exercise is good medicine for worry.
插画 · 作者之女
Illustration · The author’s daughter
身体好是自信的源泉。
Good health is a source of confidence.
困难也没什么可怕的，
睡一觉醒来就少了一半。
Difficulties are not so frightening. After a night's sleep, half of them seem to disappear.
耐心、慎重、稳重，
总是对的。
Patience, caution, and steadiness are always worthwhile.
自尊心强没错，
但不必为了虚荣干傻事。
There is nothing wrong with strong self-respect. Just do not do foolish things for the sake of vanity.
别太脆弱，要经得起风浪。
Do not be too fragile. Learn to weather the storms.
对于公众的节日和信仰，
即使自己心里与大家想的不一样，
也不必表达出来。
不要为了表达真理而伤众，
大众的认知总是慢而浅显的。
When it comes to public celebrations and shared beliefs, you need not voice your differences. Do not hurt others merely to express a truth. Public understanding is often slow to develop and stays on the surface.
偶尔地做一回无关紧要的错事，
也是无所谓的，
因为生活太单调了、无味道，
总是重复昨天是乏味的。
An occasional, inconsequential mistake does not matter much. Life can be monotonous and bland; endlessly repeating yesterday is tiresome.
不要怕，
要学习、修炼、思考，
使自己丰富强大起来。
Do not be afraid. Learn, cultivate yourself, and think. Make yourself richer in spirit and stronger within.
养生、学习、修炼、实践，
再加上思考和总结，
建立一个强的心理基础，
使自己坚韧不拔，
更有信心和力量。
Care for your health, learn, cultivate yourself, and put things into practice. Add reflection and a review of what you have learned. Build a strong mental foundation so that you become resilient, confident, and capable.
享受生活吧，
对自己大方一点儿，
对别人宽容一点儿。
对你喜欢的人大方一点儿，
对自然和动物仁爱一点儿。
你乐在其中，
完成了心愿，
你就没有恐惧，
也没有了遗憾。
你的心是平静安详的。
Enjoy life. Be a little more generous with yourself and a little more forgiving of others. Be generous with the people you like, and kind to nature and animals. When you take joy in this and fulfill your wishes, fear and regret fall away. Your heart becomes calm and peaceful.
身体健康，
有自由的时间，
不缺钱花，
就是幸福的人。
If you are healthy, have time of your own, and have enough money to spend, you are a happy person.
学琴，
是学着驾驭一种会发声的工具。
目的是使其发出美妙的声音，
用来表达你的情感及灵魂中的东西。
Learning an instrument means learning to handle a tool that makes sound. The aim is to draw beautiful sounds from it, expressing your feelings and what lives in your soul.
干想干的事，
爱喜欢的人，
帮想帮的人，
于是幸福就来了。
Do what you want to do. Love the people you like. Help those you wish to help. Happiness follows.
插画 · 作者之女
Illustration · The author’s daughter
修炼的目的是减少或消灭恐惧，
使内心平和自然。
The purpose of self-cultivation is to lessen or eliminate fear, bringing the heart to a peaceful, natural state.
无事可做，练练字也是有益的。
When there is nothing to do, practicing calligraphy is worthwhile too.
人生三个打交道：
一与人打交道；
二与钱打交道；
三与自己打交道。
做好了，就通顺了。
Life involves three kinds of dealings: with people, with money, and with yourself. Handle these well, and life flows more smoothly.
慢说话，耐心沉住气。
Speak slowly. Be patient and keep your composure.
在关键事物上下功夫、花时间、用金钱，
是值得的。
因为这是一劳永逸的功夫，
长久受益。
干事、成事都需要有过程，
所以人要有耐心。
It is worth investing effort, time, and money in what matters most. Such work can bring lasting benefits. Both doing things and accomplishing them take time, so be patient.
谁占了你的便宜，都会不爽，
除非你爱他（她）。
It feels bad when someone takes advantage of you, unless you love them.
钱和性都是敏感话题，
谈论要谨慎，
不适合的场合、不适合的人，
应免谈。
Money and sex are sensitive subjects. Discuss them carefully. With the wrong people or in the wrong setting, it is better not to discuss them at all.
一个人是否还年轻，
要看他（她）是否有性活动。
如果没有，
从心理上，
说明他（她）是老了。
女人绝经之后，
是否该有性活动，
是个问题。
Whether someone is still young depends on whether they are sexually active. If not, it suggests that, psychologically, they have grown old. Whether women should remain sexually active after menopause is a question to consider.
少说话确实有好处。
说话就像射精，
痛快之后，
剩下的是空虚和失落。
There are real benefits to speaking less. Talking is like ejaculation: after the pleasure, emptiness and a sense of loss remain.
不要自吹，
表扬的话从自己嘴里说出来是乏味的。
要用实力说话，
多做少说才有力量。
Do not boast. Praise sounds dull when it comes from your own mouth. Let your ability speak. Doing more and saying less carries weight.
急躁是最无用的，
静下心来，
一切都会清楚很多。
Impatience is useless. Quiet your mind, and everything becomes much clearer.
做事要大事化小、小事化了，
贪多贪大干不了事，
容易吃不消。
Break big problems into small ones, then resolve them. Taking on too much or aiming too big can leave you unable to cope or get anything done.
挣钱好比走上坡路，
总是要费力气的，
而花钱是走下坡路，
容易得多。
Earning money is like walking uphill: it takes effort. Spending it is like walking downhill, which is much easier.
干好事容易，
但人不爱干。
干坏事难，
但一般人干不了。
没有本事，
什么事也干不了。
Doing good is easy, yet people do not like doing it. Doing bad is hard, beyond what most people can manage. Without ability, you cannot do anything at all.
你活得好不好，不用争辩，
自己明白就好。
身体健康、情绪稳定，
有乐趣、爱艺术、会欣赏，
自信、乐观，就好。
You need not argue about whether you are living well. It is enough to know for yourself. Be healthy and emotionally steady. Have things you enjoy, love art, and know how to appreciate it. Be confident and optimistic. That is enough.
心理的修炼，非常重要。
强大的内心是战斗力，
是生存的保证。
Cultivating the mind is very important. Inner strength gives you the power to struggle and the means to survive.
物质与精神，
缺一不可。
Material well-being and the life of the spirit are both essential.
调整好生活状态，
一切都会好的。
Put your daily life in order, and things will improve.
不能总是干，要休息。
吃好睡好，一切差不了。
You cannot keep working all the time. You need rest. Eat well and sleep well, and things cannot go too badly.
求进步，
要主动、要耐心，
要有思想、有方法。
To make progress, take the initiative and be patient. Have ideas and a method.
不要没完没了地干事，
每周总要有两天什么也不干。
就是闲着。
这样做让人受益很大。
每天都忙，得不偿失。
Do not work without end. Set aside two days each week to do nothing at all. Simply be idle. It does you a great deal of good. Being busy every day costs more than it gives.
插画 · 作者之女
Illustration · The author’s daughter
抓住根本，
是安慰的保证。
Hold on to what is fundamental; it is a source of reassurance.
人生只要完成了生儿育女的任务，
孩子成人了，
你就可以干自己的事情了，
只要你身体健康、不缺钱花。
Once you have raised your children and they are adults, you can turn to your own pursuits, provided you are healthy and have enough money.
你如果什么都放不下，
那你也幸福不了。
If you cannot let go of anything, you cannot be happy either.
你如果什么都不敢想，
也什么都不敢干，
也许你长寿，
但基本等于白活。
If you dare neither to imagine nor to act, you may live a long time, but you have scarcely lived at all.
敢于突破传统道德的牢笼，
才是真正勇敢、智慧的人。
Those who dare to break out of the cage of traditional morality are truly brave and wise.
爱一个女人，
就要经常干她，
否则，就别谈爱她。
If you love a woman, fuck her often. Otherwise, do not talk about loving her.
不激动干不了大事，
太激动易把事干砸，
心也要动静结合。
Without excitement, you cannot accomplish great things. Too much excitement can ruin them. The heart needs both movement and stillness.
永远也不要放下常态的基本功练习，
有时人会失去目标，
这时也不用多想，
每天练习基本功就是了。
Never abandon regular practice of the basics. Sometimes you will lose sight of your goal. At such times, do not overthink it. Just keep practicing the fundamentals every day.
无可奈何的时候更要心静，
耐心干点儿力所能及的事，
状态会慢慢好起来的。
When there is nothing you can do, it is all the more important to stay calm. Patiently do what lies within your power. Things will gradually improve.
行动起来，
否则什么也干不成。
没有激情，生活无味。
Take action, or nothing will get done. Without passion, life has no flavor.
浪漫、激情、幽默、艺术，
是一个人的素质，
人的差别就在于此。
Romance, passion, humor, and art are qualities of a person. They are what make us different from one another.
插画 · 作者之女
Illustration · The author’s daughter
听到别人的批评，
不用马上辩解。
正确的，接受，
错了的一笑了之。
When you hear criticism, do not rush to defend yourself. Accept what is right. Smile and let the rest go.
过激的反应，
对人无益。
An excessive reaction does no one any good.
人总是生活在矛盾之中，
一个人嫌闷得慌，
两个人嫌乱得慌。
We are always living with contradictions. Alone, we feel unbearably bored; together, unbearably disturbed.
没有女人，
想有个女人，
有了女人，
又觉得是个累赘。
Without a woman, you want one. Once you have one, you feel she is a burden.
晚饭要早吃，
晚饭晚，精神减。
Eat dinner early. A late dinner leaves you with less energy.
干什么事，
没有基础和条件也不行。
Whatever you do, you need the foundations and the right conditions.
成大事都是命，
没有参考价值。
Great accomplishments are a matter of fate. They offer no useful model to follow.
凡事顺其自然为好，
勉强则不美。
It is best to let things take their natural course. Forcing them spoils their beauty.
在生活中，
几乎没有事物的发展，
与你想象的完全一致。
Almost nothing in life unfolds exactly as you imagine it will.
干一件完整的事，
中间会有很多细节与你想的不一样。
要改进、要修正，
干事的过程，
就是一个逐步完善的过程。
In carrying a task through to completion, many details will differ from what you imagined. Improve and revise as you go. Doing something is a process of gradually making it better.
第二章
CHAPTER 02养生的外因条件：
好的阳光、空气和水，
安定的社会，
和睦亲情，
富裕的物质生活。
The external conditions for good health: good sunlight, air, and water; a stable society; harmonious family relationships; and material comfort.
养生的内因条件：
稳定的情绪、智慧的头脑、兴趣广泛，
乐观自信、心无挂碍。
无有恐惧，勇敢、坚强，自得其乐。
耐得寂寞，顺应自然，有自知之明。
用自己的方法爱护自己，
随时修正错误，与时俱进。
The inner conditions for good health: steady emotions, a wise mind, wide interests, optimism, confidence, and a heart free of burdens. Be fearless, brave, strong, and able to find your own enjoyment. Endure solitude, follow nature, and know yourself. Care for yourself in your own way. Correct your mistakes and keep pace with the times.
养生是一切好事情的基础，
“无为而治”是我的真理。
什么也不干的后果，
往往都不错。
Caring for your health is the foundation of all good things. For me, “governing through non-action” is a truth. Doing nothing often turns out rather well.
有目的的养生，
是为了取长补短、更好地生活。
Purposeful care for your health means building on your strengths and making up for your weaknesses, so that you can live better.
养生主要是休息、按时睡觉。
不要想太多、不硬拼、不过分。
不多吃、不受伤、不受累、不受寒。
多享受，自然放松地生活。
Caring for your health is mainly about rest and going to sleep on time. Do not overthink, force your way through, or go to extremes. Do not overeat, get hurt, wear yourself out, or get chilled. Enjoy more, and live naturally and at ease.
主动进取，克服被动，行动起来。
Take the initiative. Overcome passivity. Get moving.
养生的要领是：
吃好、睡好、排解不良的情绪。
这三项做好了，身体自然就好了。
The essentials of good health are eating well, sleeping well, and working through negative emotions. Do these three things well, and your health will naturally improve.
都会有不良的状态，
遇到这种状态，
要用毅力去克服它，
挺住，
一切都将过去，
它会好起来的。
Everyone goes through bad periods. When one comes, use your determination to get through it. Hold on. It will pass, and things will get better.
要与众不同，
否则你怎么会出色呢？
Be different. How else will you stand out?
就比别人强一点儿。
别人没想的你想了，别人没干的你尝试过了。
别人心里没有的，你心里有。
比别人强一点儿，就是生机。
尤其是在利己和养生、学习、经营等方面。
还要舍得、要与众不同。
这种“不同”不是在口头上，
而是在思想、修炼、行动上。
Be just a little better than others. Think of what they have not thought of; try what they have not tried. Have something within you that they do not. That little difference creates opportunity, especially in looking after your interests, your health, your learning, and your affairs. Be willing to give things up, and be different. The difference must be in your thinking, self-cultivation, and actions, not merely in your words.
“口随大众，心随精英”
这话是犹太人说的。
“Let your words follow the crowd, and your mind follow the elite.” This is a saying of the Jewish people.
“损人利己”这个词是贬义词，
是用传统道德绑架别人的伪善词。
仔细想，
社会中，
人的活动哪件不是“损人利己”的呢？
从做买卖挣钱到领导管理，
就连婴儿吃奶，
严格说也算是损人利己。
为了生存，就不得不做，
这是基因里的本性。
是人把它挂上了道德的标签。
“Benefiting yourself at others' expense” is a pejorative phrase, a hypocritical way of using traditional morality to coerce people. Think carefully: which human activity in society is not at someone else's expense? From making money in business to leadership and management, even a nursing baby could, strictly speaking, be described that way. Survival makes it necessary. It is part of our genetic nature. People are the ones who attach moral labels to it.
如果“损人利己”是无害的，
那就是好事。
消灭敌人、打击敌人，
算不算“损人利己”？
重要的是看为了什么，
损的是什么人。
If “benefiting yourself at others' expense” does no harm, then it is a good thing. Does defeating or attacking an enemy count? What matters is the purpose and whose interests are being harmed.
房子A HOME
没有房子的人生是不完整的，
没有房子之前的钱不算钱。
房子是生活的基础。
Life without a home is incomplete. Until you have one, money hardly counts as money. A home is the foundation of living.
汽车A CAR
汽车虽不是生活的必需品，
但只有用车的时候才感觉有汽车是必要的。
A car may not be a necessity, but when you need one, having it feels essential.
命运FATE & FORTUNE
“命”是人的基因，
“运”是人的经历。
“命”起着决定性作用，
“运”起着发展性作用。
“命”是种子，
“运”是土地。
“Fate” is your genes; “fortune” is your experience. Fate determines the starting point, while fortune shapes its development. Fate is the seed; fortune is the soil.
“每日三省吾身”是好习惯。
“Reflecting on yourself three times a day” is a good habit.
看书、学习，
可以获得一些知识，
但学习的目的在于应用。
真知还是要从实践中得来，
自己的经验自己总结。
因为别人的经验不一定适合你。
Reading and study bring knowledge, but the purpose of learning is to use it. Real understanding still comes from practice. Draw your own lessons from your own experience, because someone else's experience may not suit you.
身体、钱和本事，
就是三样东西，
再简单点就是身体、本事两样。
其他都是衍生出来的。
There are three things: health, money, and ability. More simply, there are two: health and ability. Everything else grows out of them.
不谈政治、不谈国事，切记！
Do not discuss politics or affairs of state. Remember that!
自律、节制，
管住嘴、迈开腿。
虽然俗，但有效。
Self-discipline and moderation: watch what you eat and get moving. It may sound commonplace, but it works.
人生用三分之一养儿女，
用三分之一享受情爱，
再有三分之一，
用于以上两项追求之过程。
Devote a third of life to raising children, a third to enjoying love, and the remaining third to the pursuit of those two things.
事实证明，
理性有规律的生活，
是最好的生活状态。
Experience shows that a rational life with regular habits is the best way to live.
对生活的基本要求是：
不犯错误、少犯错误，
起码不犯大错误。
My basic requirement for life is to avoid mistakes, or at least make fewer of them. At the very least, avoid big ones.
使用工具在生活中起着重要作用，
工具使效率大大提高。
Tools play an important role in life. They greatly improve efficiency.
生活中的事物，
总是很难像想象的那样精准、完美，
总是需要修改、调整。
这也是凡大事要深思熟虑、三思而为的原因。
为的是不出差错、少出差错，保证安全。
Things in life rarely match the precision and perfection of our imagination. They always need revision and adjustment. This is why important decisions deserve careful thought before action: to avoid mistakes, reduce them, and stay safe.
赚钱要利用好两个工具：
一是生息资本，比如房子、土地等。
二是平台，如股市、汇市，
或者在某个公司、部门工作，领取工资。
Make good use of two tools for earning money. One is income-producing capital, such as a house or land. The other is a platform, such as the stock or currency market, or a job in a company or organization that pays a salary.
吃了苦头才长教训，还算是聪明人。
知错就改，也不是件容易的事。
If hardship teaches you a lesson, you are still a reasonably sensible person. Correcting a mistake once you recognize it is not easy either.
记忆力是人的智商的重要组成部分。
Memory is an important part of intelligence.
千言万语一句话：
靠自己。
A thousand words come down to this: rely on yourself.
血缘是割不断的亲情，
天然的信赖，超越其他关系。
Blood ties are an unbreakable bond of kinship, a natural trust that goes beyond other relationships.
插画 · 作者之女
Illustration · The author’s daughter
本性是刻在基因里，
一旦有了条件，就会生根发芽。
本性只能控制，不能改变。
Our nature is written into our genes. Given the right conditions, it takes root and sprouts. It can be controlled, but not changed.
人有多大胆，地有多高产。
这话有道理。
“The bolder the people, the greater the harvest.” There is something to that saying.
其实胆大就是自信，
自信来源于实力，
实力来源于良好的身体和精神。
Boldness is really confidence. Confidence comes from strength, and strength from a sound body and mind.
过分的努力是浪费，
害怕和犹豫不决也是浪费。
总之，过了、多了，放弃了，都是浪费。
不能在所有的领域都大手大脚，
处处都浪费，人生就完蛋了。
Excessive effort is wasteful. Fear and indecision are wasteful too. Going too far, doing too much, and giving up can all be forms of waste. You cannot be extravagant in every area of life. Waste everything, everywhere, and you are finished.
一件事儿想开了就不是事儿，
想不开就成了大事儿了。
一件负面的事情造成的心理阴影，
比事情本身大得多。
解决这多余的负面情绪，就是修炼。
When you come to terms with something, it stops being a problem. If you cannot, it becomes a big one. The psychological shadow of a bad event can be much larger than the event itself. Working through those unnecessary emotions is self-cultivation.
人的普遍错误是，
遇好事越想越好，遇坏事越想越坏。
要克服这种心理趋势，
要客观公正地看待事物，摒弃偏见。
A common mistake is to imagine good things getting ever better and bad things ever worse. Resist that tendency. Look at things objectively and fairly, and set prejudice aside.
会挣钱肯定算是一种聪明。
体面地挣钱、大方地花钱是幸福的。
Knowing how to earn money is certainly a form of intelligence. Earning it honorably and spending it generously is happiness.
没有规矩，不成方圆。
遵守规矩，有益健康。
Without rules, nothing takes proper shape. Following rules is good for your health.
一分精神，一分福。
累了、没有精神了，什么也干不好。
所以克制是必要的，
克制的目的是可持续发展。
Every measure of vitality brings a measure of happiness. When you are tired and have no energy, you cannot do anything well. Restraint is therefore necessary. Its purpose is to make life sustainable.
如果生活还过得去，
那就生个孩子吧，
比青史留名强。
If you are getting by reasonably well, have a child. It is better than having your name go down in history.
人要有追求、有梦想、有情趣，
生命才有意义。
People need pursuits, dreams, and a sense of enjoyment for life to have meaning.
夜是睡眠专用，
不要胡思乱想。
Night is reserved for sleep. Do not fill it with wandering thoughts.
生活的基础是吃饭、睡觉和平静的心情。
The foundations of life are food, sleep, and a peaceful mind.
什么是正确的行动准则呢？
那就是：该干什么的时候干什么。
What is the right principle for action? Do what needs to be done when it needs to be done.
让自己的身心都干干净净，
没有尘埃和杂念，那可是最好的状态。
Keep body and mind clean, free of dust and distracting thoughts. That is the finest state to be in.
精神饱满、平静喜悦的心多美。
How beautiful a heart is when it is full of energy, calm, and joy.
大人物有大人物的苦乐，
小人物有小人物的苦乐，
人生大体上差不多，
知识格局、规模大小不同。
Important people have their joys and sorrows; ordinary people have theirs. Life is much the same. What differs is knowledge, perspective, and scale.
一个人的基本生活用不了多少钱，
花大钱都是在追求欲望上。
但往往是花钱找罪受。
总之，花钱有益就好。
Basic living does not cost much. The big money goes on chasing desires, often buying trouble for ourselves. In the end, spending is worthwhile if it does you good.
理论学习和生活实践缺一不可，
否则得不到真知。
Theoretical learning and lived practice are both essential. Without either, there is no real understanding.
休息和睡觉是最好的良药。
Rest and sleep are the best medicine.
意图改变他人，
追求他人的认同，
或是错了方向的努力，
都是自寻烦恼。
Trying to change others, seeking their approval, or putting effort in the wrong direction all amount to making trouble for yourself.
好好活着，
为了情趣，
为了美好的自然。
Live well, for life's delights and for the beauty of nature.
插画 · 作者之女
Illustration · The author’s daughter
只要不是你亲眼见到的，
都不一定是真相。
你看到的、听到的，
也只是表面，
要用心才可能有真知。
If you have not seen it with your own eyes, it may not be the truth. Even what you see and hear is only the surface. Real understanding takes attentive thought.
你亲眼看到了，
你从内心感受到了，
那才是真相，
感受不可替代。
When you have seen it yourself and felt it within, that is truth. Nothing can replace experience.
人生的目的就是为了养育后代，
还有生活的情趣和手段，
其他都是扯淡。
The purpose of life is to raise the next generation, enjoy living, and find the means to do so. The rest is bullshit.
人的终极乐趣全在交配，
除此之外，
无大乐趣。
Our ultimate pleasure lies in sex. Apart from it, there is no great pleasure.
失去性能力之后的人生意义减半。
After the loss of sexual ability, life's meaning is cut in half.
事实告诉我，
别听道德的，
要听本性的。
Experience tells me: do not listen to morality. Listen to your nature.
躺着休息，永远没错。
Lying down to rest is never wrong.
干错事，不如不干事。
多干事，不如少干事。
少干事，不如不干事。
不干再加上心安理得，
那就是神仙了。
Better to do nothing than to do the wrong thing. Better to do less than more. Better still to do nothing. Do nothing with a clear conscience, and you are practically an immortal.
科学的生活状态是：
精神、物质在支出上各占一半。
这样才是好的生活方式。
有多数人重物质、轻精神，
为了生活忍受着精神上的痛苦。
A sound way of living is to divide spending equally between material needs and the life of the spirit. Many people value material things too highly and the spirit too little, enduring mental suffering for the sake of making a living.
离不开人群的人，
多数都是傻逼。
Most people who cannot bear to be away from a crowd are fucking idiots.
既然人是生活在社会中的，
那就必然没有绝对的自由，
肯定会受到制度和道德的约束。
Because we live in society, there can be no absolute freedom. Institutions and morality inevitably place limits on us.
你是社会人，
就离不开社会制度的保护和约束。
As a member of society, you cannot escape either the protection or the constraints of its institutions.
“无为”是养生的好方法，
心中有挂碍，怎能养生呢？
无忧无虑，无为而治。
“Non-action” is a good way to care for your health. How can you nurture yourself with a burdened heart? Be free of worry and let things take their course.
抓住生活的根本，就是最大的节约。
看问题、做事情，不得要领就是浪费。
Grasping life's essentials is the greatest economy. Missing the point when you think or act is wasteful.
无论在什么地方，
好的总是少数，多了就不好。
这是定律。
所以要做少数。
Wherever you are, good things are always in the minority. Once there are too many, they cease to be good. That is a rule. Be among the few.
先知、敢为、慢为，
基本上就是胜利者。
See ahead, dare to act, and act unhurriedly. That is largely what makes a winner.
一个“养”字妙不可言。
身体靠“养”，
感情靠“养”，
孩子靠“养”，
行事和思考靠“养”，
习惯靠“养”。
“养”字太有用了，
培养是一切的基础。
The word “nurture” is wonderfully useful. The body needs nurturing, as do affection, children, action, thought, and habits. Cultivation is the foundation of everything.
生活需要理性、理论支撑。
只有在正确的理论指导下，
再与现实相结合，
有计划、有目标，
有激情、有身心愉悦、有收获，
这样的生活才有趣、有益、有意义。
Life needs reason and a supporting framework of ideas. Guided by sound thinking and grounded in reality, with plans, goals, passion, well-being, and something gained, life becomes interesting, beneficial, and meaningful.
好的状态是：
兜里有钱、心里没事。
抓住事物的根本就省心了。
A good state to be in: money in your pocket and nothing weighing on your mind. Get to the heart of things, and you spare yourself worry.
如果只管自己的事，
用不着多大的能量，
自给自足就可以了。
Looking after only your own affairs does not take much energy. Being self-sufficient is enough.
管理一个国家与管理一个家庭类似。
相比之下，管好一个家庭付出的辛苦更大。
二者也没有本质的区别。
Running a country is like running a household. By comparison, running a household well takes even more hard work. There is no essential difference between the two.
除了生养孩子的人和养育众生的人，
谁活着有实际意义呢？
Apart from those who bear and raise children, and those who nurture living beings, whose life has practical meaning?
人要做：
创造者、维护者、爱惜者、
养育者、供给者、消费者。
不要做：
破坏者、促退者、残忍者、独裁者。
Be a creator, a maintainer, someone who cherishes, a nurturer, a provider, and a consumer. Do not be a destroyer, a force for regression, a cruel person, or a dictator.
有精神就多干一点儿事儿，
没有精神就少干一点儿。
这世界没有谁都一样，
不用太勉强。
Do a little more when you have energy, and a little less when you do not. The world carries on without any of us. Do not force yourself too much.
人生大致分两个阶段，
学习工作阶段和休息阶段。
学习工作阶段好比酿酒，
休息阶段好比喝酒。
酿酒要付出努力，
喝酒要精心、慢慢品味。
Life has roughly two stages: learning and working, then resting. The first is like making wine; the second is like drinking it. Making wine takes effort. Drinking it calls for care and slow appreciation.
趁着年轻打下一些基础，
老了可以轻松一些。
Lay some foundations while you are young, so that old age can be easier.
时间与青春一样，
不用也要流逝，
行动起来，不要彷徨。
Time, like youth, passes whether you use it or not. Act. Do not hesitate.
年轻时，生儿、育女、挣钱，
年老时，养生、修心。
When young, have children, raise them, and earn money. When old, care for your health and cultivate your heart.
见好就收、知难而退，是明智之举。
Knowing when to stop while ahead, and when to retreat from difficulty, is wise.
人在完成了自己的基本任务以后，
就可以养生、享受生活了。
但人只要生活在社会中，斗争也是难免的。
要雄心常在。
After completing life's basic tasks, you can care for your health and enjoy living. Still, as long as you live in society, struggle is inevitable. Keep your ambition alive.
人的选择能力最重要，
只要选择对了，
剩下的就是时间问题了。
The ability to choose is what matters most. Once the choice is right, the rest is a matter of time.
插画 · 作者之女
Illustration · The author’s daughter
时机来了要抓住，
因为那是老天爷给你的奖励。
Seize an opportunity when it comes. It is a reward from heaven.
话要少说，
事要稳着做。
Say less. Do things steadily.
生活就是，
干事之后好好休息、享受生活。
不多事总不算错。
Life means resting well and enjoying yourself after doing your work. Not taking on extra trouble is rarely wrong.
宽容、律己，少言、少事，养生、修炼。
Be tolerant and self-disciplined. Speak less and take on less. Care for your health and cultivate yourself.
与己无关的事，
不听、不看，随他去。
If something has nothing to do with you, do not listen or look. Let it be.
不较劲，
你好、我好、大家好。
Do not lock horns. Let things be good for you, good for me, and good for everyone.
爱护情绪，
爱护身心，
从容喜悦。
Care for your emotions, your body, and your mind. Be at ease and joyful.
不要随便帮助别人，
没有好处。
Do not casually offer to help others. Nothing good comes of it.
与有家的人玩感情要慎重，
言行不可留下把柄，
免得惹麻烦。
Be cautious about romantic entanglements with someone who already has a family. Do not leave words or actions that can be used against you, or you may invite trouble.
每天只干一点儿有益的事，
只要干实了，
将来必有回报。
Do just a little worthwhile work each day. If it is done in earnest, it will bring a return in time.
人不可能面面俱到，
大体上正确就已经不易了，
勿求完美，完美不常在。
No one can attend to everything. Getting things broadly right is hard enough. Do not seek perfection; it is rarely found.
适合自己的，才是最好的。
还有两点：一是客观价值，二是运气。
每个人的基本需求大致相同，但条件不同造成差异很大。
客观价值是，无论你是否认同，它的价值都是存在的。
上面我表达的是，个人价值观与客观价值的不同。如果你的价值观与客观价值吻合，你就获益。
What suits you is best.
There are two more things: objective value and luck. People's basic needs are much alike, but different circumstances create great differences.
Objective value exists whether or not you recognize it. What I am describing is the difference between personal values and objective value. When the two align, you benefit.
插画 · 作者之女
Illustration · The author’s daughter
无知者无畏，
这句话有点儿道理，
但更深层的还是艺高人胆大。
There is some truth in “the ignorant know no fear.” At a deeper level, though, skill is what gives a person courage.
第三章
CHAPTER 03我的生存原则MY PRINCIPLE FOR LIVING
一切规矩都要对我有益，
一切真理、理论都要对我有帮助、有益处。
对我无益的、无用的、有害的，
一律不采纳、不拥护、不执行、不参与。
一切要以对自己有益为原则。
Every rule must benefit me. Every truth and theory must help me or do me good. If something is useless, harmful, or of no benefit to me, I will neither adopt nor support it, carry it out nor take part in it. Everything must be guided by what is beneficial to me.
我的真理MY TRUTH
少想事、不烦忧，
吃喝玩乐解忧愁。
锻炼身体、学艺术，
悟道理、看世界，
重事实、认真理。
不瞎想、不做梦，必无黄粱梦醒时。
信科学、信天道，人生能力最重要。
要怕苦、要怕累，累坏身体活受罪。
不成名、不成家，也不用人夸。
世炎凉、人情薄，
看清了、心不寒，
靠自己、靠天命，
胡思乱想没有用。
Think less; do not fret. Eat, drink, and enjoy yourself to ease your worries. Exercise, study art, understand life's principles, and see the world. Respect facts and recognize truth. Do not indulge in wild thoughts or dreams, and you will never wake from a fool's paradise. Trust science and the natural order; ability matters most in life. Be wary of hardship and exhaustion: wearing out your body only brings suffering. No need for fame, distinction, or praise. See the world's coldness and the thinness of human affection clearly, without letting your heart grow cold. Rely on yourself and on fate. Idle speculation is no use.
随心所欲是生活最佳状态。
Following your own inclinations is the best state of life.
没有完美的好办法，
与现实一模一样的理论是不存在的。
所以，
要随机应变才能解决问题。
应变能力是最实用的能力。
There is no perfect solution, and no theory matches reality exactly. To solve problems, you must adapt to circumstances. Adaptability is the most useful ability.
人一定要有主见、有定力。
我心不动，谁奈我何？
Have a mind of your own and the strength to remain steady. If my heart does not waver, what can anyone do to me?
要领先、要与众不同；
要判断准、要选择对；
要耐心，要恒久；
要坚定，要有信心；
要胜利，要又好又长。
Lead the way and be different. Judge accurately and choose well. Be patient and persistent. Be firm and confident. Succeed, and make that success both good and lasting.
随心所欲、不逾矩，是最高境界。
To follow your heart without overstepping the bounds is the highest state.
健康舒适、心平气和，
是金不换的好状态。
Good health, comfort, and peace of mind are a state beyond price.
强人就是身体好，
有精神、有胆识。
A strong person has good health, energy, courage, and judgment.
聪明人和笨蛋的区别是：
聪明人越读书越聪明，
笨蛋念多少书还是笨蛋。
The difference between a clever person and a fool: the clever grow wiser as they read, while a fool remains a fool no matter how many books they read.
没有天分，就干点普通的事情，
免得受罪。
If you lack a particular talent, do something ordinary and spare yourself the suffering.
身心健康是最大的幸福。
Health in body and mind is the greatest happiness.
心中充满希望，
生活才有乐趣。
Life is enjoyable when the heart is full of hope.
插画 · 作者之女
Illustration · The author’s daughter
会休息，身心才能健康。
很多病是累出来的。
累心也不好，
要放得下，放下了，心就舒畅了。
You need to know how to rest to keep body and mind healthy. Many illnesses come from exhaustion. Mental strain is harmful too. Learn to let go. Once you do, your heart feels lighter.
女人的话，可不能全信。
她们常喜欢借事撒个小谎，
有时又会说一些口是心非的话试探你的反应。
总之，真真假假、虚虚实实。
You cannot believe everything a woman says. Women often use an occasion to tell a little lie, or say something they do not mean to test your reaction. In short, truth and falsehood, sincerity and pretense, are mixed together.
没有百分之百的纯爱情，
即使有也是单方面的病态。
不过也有例外，
比如一起殉情，
那也是被外力逼的。
感情这东西，
没有没劲，
有了又费心、又痛苦，
凡人就是活在矛盾之中的。
There is no completely pure romantic love. Even if there were, it would be a one-sided obsession. There may be exceptions, such as lovers dying together, but even that is driven by outside pressure. Without love, life is dull; with it, there is worry and pain. Ordinary people live in contradiction.
人与人之间，
有时就差一点儿。
不要小看差这一小点儿，
有的是习惯有些不同，
就是这一小点的不同，
日子长了，就是两种完全不同的人生。
Sometimes the difference between people is tiny. Do not underestimate it. A small difference in habits, given enough time, can lead to two entirely different lives.
真理有相对性、有时间性，
这是思想的精髓。
Truth is relative and shaped by its time. This is central to clear thinking.
我很早就独自发现了幸存者偏差这个现象，
也许我有点聪明吧。
I independently noticed survivorship bias very early on. Perhaps I am a little clever.
成功的人都是幸运的，
努力的作用不大。
Successful people are all fortunate. Effort plays only a small part.
我有时认为努力基本等于愚蠢。
最起码努力也不该放在明面上。
Sometimes I think effort is almost the same as foolishness. At the very least, it should not be put on display.
一个人的欲望要和能力相符合才是幸福的。
否则欲望高于能力，
总是在力不从心的状态下，
那就不容易找到幸福感。
Happiness comes when your desires match your abilities. If your desires exceed what you can do, you are always struggling beyond your capacity, and happiness is hard to find.
幽默能化解尴尬。
Humor can dissolve embarrassment.
插画 · 作者之女
Illustration · The author’s daughter
我命好，
存感恩，
心中有数就行了。
I have been fortunate. Be grateful. Knowing it in my own heart is enough.
有困难，
不用怕，
挺过去就是胜利。
Do not fear difficulty. Getting through it is victory.
戒定慧，断舍离。
戒掉坏毛病，心就定了。心一定，智慧就来了。与恶害绝缘，舍去没用的。离开愚昧、丑恶、有害的，生活就好了。
Discipline, concentration, wisdom. Refuse, discard, let go.
Give up bad habits, and the mind settles. When it settles, wisdom comes. Cut yourself off from harmful things; discard what is useless. Leave ignorance, ugliness, and harm behind, and life improves.
人的身体和物质条件，相当于硬件。
后天学习、经历、经验的积累，相当于软件。
生活的程序应该是硬件准备好，
软件慢慢装。
Your body and material circumstances are like hardware. Learning, experience, and the knowledge you accumulate are like software. Life should begin with the hardware in place, then install the software gradually.
傻逼不说话也许别人还不知道他是傻逼，
言多无益。
If a fucking idiot keeps quiet, others may not realize he is one. Too much talk does no good.
吃饱了、喝足了躺着，
是人生最正确的事。
Lying down after eating and drinking your fill is the most sensible thing in life.
人在儿女长大成人之后，
除了养生之外，
几乎无什么可做的了。
好好养生、修炼，
但求有个好死。
Once your children are grown, there is little left to do apart from caring for your health. Nurture and cultivate yourself, and hope for a peaceful death.
生活经历就是力量，
经历使人增加勇气和自信，促人成长。
Life experience is strength. It builds courage and confidence and helps you grow.
在家省，出门费，所以要有家。
在家，有益身心。出门，费精力。
静养财，多动费财、费神。
Staying home saves; going out costs. That is why you need a home. Home is good for body and mind. Going out uses energy. Stillness preserves wealth; too much activity spends both money and spirit.
人最忌讳的是用力过猛。
用力过猛是愚笨的表现。
要做到恰如其分，
要靠平时的学习、实践和修炼，还有天分。
Above all, avoid using too much force. Overdoing things is a sign of foolishness. Getting the measure right takes regular learning, practice, self-cultivation, and talent.
“运气、运气，运好自己的气。”
——曾仕强
“Good fortune, good fortune: learn to direct your own vital energy.” — Zeng Shiqiang
做好自己的事，不要浪费时间去管别人。
自己该做的自己先做好。
不用看别的脸，
做好自己的事，
受益的是自己。
Take care of your own affairs. Do not waste time managing others. First do what you yourself ought to do. You need not watch other people's expressions. Do your own work well; you are the one who benefits.
学习小提琴能证明一个人是否聪明，
如果你能把小提琴拉好了，
还有什么事做不好呢？
Learning the violin can show whether someone is intelligent. If you can play it well, what else could you not do well?
说话要走脑子，
不能胡说八道。
Think before you speak. Do not talk nonsense.
爱一个女人，
就是为了征服她之后满足了，
征服不了痛苦了，
这就是爱的全部过程了。
Loving a woman means seeking the satisfaction of conquering her, and suffering if you cannot. That is the whole process of love.
知行合一才能干成事，
才能进步。
Only by bringing knowledge and action together can you accomplish things and make progress.
人生干好一件事都很难，
因为干一件事，
需要做很多辅助的学习、练习，
而不是孤立的只做事情本身。
Even doing one thing well in life is difficult. It requires supporting study and practice, not simply doing the task in isolation.
人生活在社会中，
表面文章还是要做的，
否则你将寸步难行。
Living in society, you still have to keep up appearances. Otherwise, you will get nowhere.
人往高处走，
在生活中无论顺逆，
都要向上走，
无论快慢，
总是一步步的向好的地方走。
Keep moving upward in life, through good times and bad. Fast or slow, take one step at a time toward somewhere better.
事分轻重缓急，分清了，干起来就有条理。
办急事，心不能急、形不能乱。
越是急、越要稳。
不急的事可以分开了慢慢干，
一天干一点，或者想起来干一点。
难干的事、有害的事，
就要想办法把它消化掉、淡化掉、消灭掉。
处理好轻重缓急，生活就会顺畅，越来越好。
Sort matters by importance and urgency, and your work gains order. When something is urgent, do not let your mind rush or your actions fall into disorder. The more urgent it is, the steadier you must be. Less urgent tasks can be done gradually, a little each day or whenever they come to mind. Find ways to absorb, reduce, or eliminate difficult and harmful matters. Get your priorities right, and life becomes smoother and better.
插画 · 作者之女
Illustration · The author’s daughter
改变别人不容易，
完善自己是好方法。
自己强大了，事就顺了。
Changing others is difficult. Improving yourself is a good approach. As you grow stronger, things go more smoothly.
去掉多余的，
留下最好的。
多余的话不说，
多余的力不使，
多余的事不做，
肯定是有益的。
Remove what is unnecessary; keep what is best. Leave unnecessary words unsaid, effort unspent, and tasks undone. This is surely beneficial.
人只要有感知，
就会有不如意，
这是与生俱来的。
所以不用害怕和烦恼，
不用在乎，
往前走就是了。
As long as we can feel, we will encounter dissatisfaction. It comes with being alive. There is no need to fear it or fret over it. Let it be and keep going.
对于奴隶性的人要常挥动鞭子，
不然双方都会忘了身份，
太放任无益。
With people of a servile nature, you must keep cracking the whip, or both sides will forget their place. Too much leniency does no good.
常用来提醒自己的话：
自强不息，乐观向上；
智慧勇敢，公平节制；
有益，有趣。
Words I often use to remind myself: keep improving; stay optimistic; be wise and brave, fair and restrained; seek what is useful and interesting.
要尽量让自己活得有价值。
要前进、要创新、要提高。
以逸待劳是好方法，
用力过猛是最笨的方法。
Try to make your life worthwhile. Move forward, innovate, and improve. Waiting rested for the right moment is a good method. Using excessive force is the stupidest one.
生活没有内容是难耐的，
总要干点儿什么，但不能很累。
A life without anything in it is hard to bear. Do something, but do not exhaust yourself.
学习艺术，享受艺术；
丰富生活，益处多多。
Study art and enjoy it. Enrich your life; the benefits are many.
用最少的精力，获得最大的利益和快乐，
让生活更有效率。
Gain the greatest benefit and happiness with the least energy. Make life more efficient.
做事不要着急，要做好准备。
平时多练基本功，用时就轻松。
Do not rush. Prepare well. Practice the basics regularly, and things will be easier when the time comes.
人离开了智慧、勇敢，
将干不了任何事情。
Without wisdom and courage, you cannot accomplish anything.
看明白了，不说出来，是好状态。
To understand clearly and leave it unspoken is a good state to be in.
过好每一天，吃好三顿饭。
有精力，折腾一下；
没精力，老实待着。
Live each day well and eat three good meals. If you have energy, do something lively. If you do not, stay quietly put.
插画 · 作者之女
Illustration · The author’s daughter
文学家都是生活比较沧桑的人，
平凡的人当不了文学家。
Writers are people whose lives have weathered many changes. An ordinary person cannot become a literary writer.
心里没事儿最好，
但能做到也不容易。
人要养家糊口，
都是钱闹的，没钱不行。
It is best to have nothing weighing on your mind, but that is not easy. People have families to support. It all comes down to money; you cannot do without it.
人要顺其自然。
有机会干大事，
无机会，顺其自然。
Follow the natural course of things. If an opportunity comes, do something great. If none comes, let things be.
做一个行动主义者，
不做口头革命派。
Be a person of action, not an armchair revolutionary.
只要能独立思考、能独立生活的人，
就能算是个平民英雄。
Anyone who can think independently and live independently can be called an everyday hero.
帝王将相很累，
因为他们要靠别人为他们服务，
所以不累是不可能的。
Rulers, generals, and ministers are tired because they depend on others to serve them. It is impossible for them not to be tired.
古代社会一个人单独生活是很难的，
今天的人是可以完全独立生活，
只要身体好、有钱花。
In ancient times, living entirely on your own was difficult. Today, complete independence is possible, provided you are healthy and have money to spend.
人为财死、鸟为食亡，
道透了生命的本性。
“People die for wealth, birds for food” lays bare the nature of life.
不要被假象所迷惑。
Do not be misled by appearances.
你的胆量就是你的实力。
Your courage is your strength.
做事要精心准备，大胆行动。
Prepare carefully. Act boldly.
只要开始了，
就专心干下去，
有错误要逐步改正，
就不要再胡思乱想了。
Once you begin, give the task your full attention. Correct mistakes as you go, and stop letting your thoughts wander.
干事情，
身体是基础，
精力不足，
什么事也干不了。
Health is the foundation of getting things done. Without enough energy, you can do nothing.
修行的目的是为了更好地生活，
违背了这个目的，就是错误的。
The purpose of self-cultivation is to live better. Anything that goes against that purpose is mistaken.
好的社会不是靠压迫，
而是靠干净的法治。
让人心甘情愿地做自己的工作。
A good society rests on an uncorrupted rule of law, not oppression. It allows people to do their work willingly.
好的社会制度必是宽容的、和谐的、平等的，
且是自由祥和的。
A good social system must be tolerant, harmonious, equal, free, and peaceful.
人的行为有两种形式的驱动。
一种是精神驱使，一种是利益驱动。
一种是主动的，一种是被动的。
为了利益做不愿意做的事是利益驱使，
是被动的。
为了兴趣去做的事是精神驱使，
是主动的。
Human behavior has two kinds of driving force: inner motivation and material interest. One is active; the other is passive. Doing something you do not want to do for a benefit is driven by interest, and is passive. Doing something because it interests you is driven by the spirit, and is active.
人生活的目的，
除生育外，
就是让自己的精神和物质欲望最大化、完美化。
完成自己的世界观、价值观。
Apart from having children, the purpose of life is to fulfill material and spiritual desires as fully as possible, bringing your worldview and values to fruition.
检验行为的对错，
标准是看结果是否有益。
Judge an action by whether its outcome is beneficial.
多余的言行是浪费，
把握好言行的尺度是能力。
Unnecessary words and actions are waste. Knowing their proper measure is an ability.
行为的原则要利生、有趣、长远、健康，
不要损伤、无益、无趣、浪费、被动、超劳、
过分、贪婪和身不由己。
Let your actions support life, be interesting, take the long view, and protect health. Avoid harm, futility, boredom, waste, passivity, overwork, excess, greed, and the loss of control over your own life.
人生可悲的是：
身不由己和生活所迫，
包括已经当官发财的人。
What is sad in life is being unable to act freely and being forced by circumstances, even for those who have gained office or wealth.
容易被忽视的行为，
比如性交、情爱、肉身的抚慰，
异性接触刺激产生的荷尔蒙，
是养生的细微之处。
Often-overlooked acts, such as sex, affection, bodily comfort, and the hormonal response to contact with the opposite sex, are subtle aspects of caring for one's health.
对于养生，
多数人想到的就是吃，但没想到消化吸收，
没有想到情趣对人健康的益处。
忽视了“无为”对人的益处，
往往看不到细节对人的健康的重要作用。
要重视性、情爱、情趣，
对内分泌起着很重要的作用。
When thinking about health, most people think of food, but not digestion and absorption, or the benefits of enjoyment. They overlook the value of “non-action” and the importance of small details. Pay attention to sex, affection, and pleasure; they play an important role in the body's hormonal activity.
好的生活状态是，
不要离人群太远，
也不要被社会和道德裹挟，
当是自由的、轻松自在的。
A good life keeps you within reach of other people without letting society and morality sweep you along. It should be free, relaxed, and at ease.
当前的形势是信息、观点泛滥，
如果自己的思想基础不牢固，
就会随波逐流，被潮流带着走，不能自拔，
活出被动人生，到头后悔晚矣。
We live amid a flood of information and opinions. Without a firm foundation of thought, you will drift with the current, be swept along, and struggle to escape. You will live passively, and by the time you regret it, it will be too late.
要多学习、多实践。
大胆经风雨、见世面，
建立自己正确的思想基础，
修正生活中的错误偏差，
不随波逐流，
活出自己正确、主动的人生。
Study more and practice more. Boldly weather storms and see the world. Build a sound foundation for your own thinking. Correct the errors in your life. Do not drift with the crowd. Live deliberately, guided by your own considered judgment.
内心和物质的强大缺一不可。
物质和精神相互促进，交替发展。
物质助长精神，精神促进物质。
良性循环，生生不息。
Inner strength and material strength are both essential. Matter and spirit support one another and develop in turn. Material resources nourish the spirit; the spirit advances material well-being. A virtuous cycle, renewing itself without end.
要想身体好，休息不可少。
营养不能缺，行为不可过。
内心不能乱，规矩不能越。
Good health requires rest. Do not neglect nutrition or act to excess. Keep the mind from disorder, and stay within the bounds.
生活的常态：
养生、行乐、学习，不逾矩。
The ordinary rhythm of life: care for your health, enjoy yourself, learn, and do not overstep the bounds.
人不学习，就不能优越。
不优越，自信何来？
Without learning, you cannot excel. Without excellence, where does confidence come from?
大到人生，
小到生活琐事。
大体上都要有个计划，
否则易迷失方向，无所适从。
From the course of a lifetime to everyday tasks, it helps to have a plan. Otherwise, it is easy to lose direction and not know what to do.
在社会中生存，
要看清时代、认清形势，
放眼未来、脚踏实地、与时俱进。
To live in society, understand your era and circumstances. Look to the future, keep your feet on the ground, and move with the times.
再说一遍：
不要害怕。
害怕本身就很可怕。
想办法，行动起来或者原地不动。
让心灵平静，踏实下来。
Let me say it again: do not be afraid. Fear itself is frightening. Find a way forward. Take action, or stay where you are. Let your mind settle into peace and steadiness.
不要与你不亲近的人说你的好，
除了引来嫉妒之外，没有任何好处。
当然如果你巧妙地亮出实力，
让其敬佩，
那是另外一回事。
Do not tell people you are not close to how well you are doing. It brings nothing but envy. Of course, showing your strength skillfully enough to earn respect is another matter.
用能力镇压对手也是必要的。
It is sometimes necessary to use your ability to subdue an opponent.
话不能说尽，
话说尽了心就虚了。
Do not say everything. When nothing is left unsaid, the heart feels empty.
利用好你的条件是很大的节约。
Making good use of what you have is a great saving.
我认为实用与价格不是绝对关系。
经验告诉我，
真正对自己有益有用、好用的东西，
往往是最便宜的。
花大价钱买来的东西，往往最无用。
Usefulness and price are not necessarily linked. Experience tells me that the things that truly benefit me and work well are often the cheapest. Things bought at great expense are often the least useful.
对于女孩子，
青春之美是无价之宝。
做父母的要尽力让女儿的青春自然尽情地绽放。
For a girl, the beauty of youth is priceless. Parents should do their best to let their daughter's youth blossom naturally and fully.
人成熟得早有好处，
先出头的蛹好找伴。
There are benefits to maturing early. The first to emerge from the chrysalis finds a mate more easily.
醒悟得早、身体好是一个人的福气。
恐惧来源于陌生，
所以人要经风雨、见世面。
要经事，经历多了，恐惧就少了。
Coming to understanding early and having good health are blessings. Fear comes from unfamiliarity. Weather storms, see the world, and go through things. With more experience comes less fear.
青春的激情最美，
但很短，不知不觉，就过去了。
The passion of youth is beautiful but brief. Before you notice, it has passed.
人道有情，
天道实际。
小事讲人情，
大事顺天道。
The human way has feeling; the natural order is practical. In small matters, honor human ties. In great matters, follow the natural order.
在没有目标或者条件受限时，
只要把吃饭、睡觉、学习、运动都做了，
一天的任务就算完成了。
只要把每天的事做好，
即使没有目标，也不会落伍。
When you have no goal or your circumstances are limited, eating, sleeping, studying, and exercising are enough to complete the day's tasks. Do each day's work well, and even without a goal, you will not fall behind.
干大事，
养生、学习、练功都是不能急的。
要耐心、等时机。
平时练基本功，
等有了机会，
形势好转，
你平时积累就显现效果了。
Great undertakings, health, study, and practice cannot be rushed. Be patient and wait for the right moment. Keep working on the basics. When opportunity arrives and conditions improve, what you have built up will show its worth.
心不急、不乱、有精力，
凡事可做。
累了心乱了，
什么也别做。
先休息，
不能连续干事情，
要有休息时间。
When the mind is calm and clear and you have energy, you can do things. When you are tired and unsettled, do nothing. Rest first. You cannot keep working continuously; you need time to recover.
睡觉是大事，要有保障。
要找出适合自己的规律。
把精力、体力用好。
恰到好处地让身心在适当的时候放松，
渐渐进入睡眠状态。
自然地睡、自然地醒，
养成早睡的习惯。
Sleep is important and must be protected. Find a rhythm that suits you. Use your mental and physical energy well. Let body and mind relax at the right time and in the right measure, gradually easing into sleep. Sleep naturally, wake naturally, and make an early bedtime a habit.
该做的都做了，
你就踏踏实实地睡觉吧！
Once you have done what needed doing, sleep with an easy mind!
方向错了，
再加上执着的努力，
是最有害的，后果很惨。
做正事之前要三思，
考虑好了、正确了，
再下手不迟。
Going in the wrong direction with determined effort is especially harmful, and the consequences can be terrible. Think carefully before undertaking something serious. Once you have considered it and know it is right, there is still time to act.
平时的观察与思考，
是战时的武器、操作时的真功夫，
是平时积累的结果。
Everyday observation and reflection become your weapons in battle and your real skill in practice. They are the fruit of what you have built up over time.
情绪不好，少说话；
情绪不好，不干事情。
调整好情绪，说话就顺了，事情就好办了。
When you are in a bad mood, speak less and leave tasks alone. Once your emotions settle, words come more easily and things are easier to do.
干小事，
有无数的竞争对手。
干中等的事，
竞争会少很多。
干大事，
竞争者只有几个。
In small undertakings, there are countless competitors. In medium ones, far fewer. In great undertakings, only a handful.
一生只干两件事：
一、养生；
二、挣钱。
身体维护保养好了，才能赚钱。
有了好身体，有了钱，其他问题，迎刃而解。
Do two things in life: first, look after your health; second, earn money. Care for the body well so that you can earn. With good health and money, other problems become easier to solve.
睡个好觉，是一切好的开始。
A good night's sleep is the beginning of everything good.
人不要太瘦，
微胖最好。
稍微胖一点，
精神好、有福气，
养财、长寿。
Do not be too thin. A little plumpness is best. A little extra weight brings energy, good fortune, wealth, and longevity.
做事情累了，
马上停下来。
休息好了再干，
否则越干越不好。
When work makes you tired, stop at once. Rest before continuing. Otherwise, the more you do, the worse it gets.
插画 · 作者之女
Illustration · The author’s daughter
花钱买时间吧。
能花钱解决的事，
就花钱办。
不要为了省钱而浪费了时间，
时间是用来享受的。
Spend money to buy time. If money can solve something, use it. Do not waste time merely to save money. Time is for enjoying life.
在人多的地方少说话，
更不要妄言。
没有好处，只有坏处。
Say little in a crowd, and avoid reckless remarks. They bring harm and no benefit.
有话好好说，否则不说。
If you have something to say, say it well. Otherwise, say nothing.
一个人能独处，有益处。
也是一个人的贵气。
与一群乌合之众混在一起，
毫无益处。
Being able to be alone is beneficial. It is also a kind of dignity. Mixing with a disorderly crowd does you no good.
只有做官的人喜欢人多，
否则他找不到存在感。
Only officials like having crowds around them; otherwise, they cannot feel their own importance.
权力是人类最坏的发明。
权力发挥了人的恶。
在权力面前，
没有真理，
只有压迫。
“权”违背了优胜劣汰的法则，
是人类退化的开始。
Power is humanity's worst invention. It brings out our evil. Before power, there is no truth, only oppression. Power goes against the principle of the fittest prevailing; it marks the beginning of human decline.
在社会中，
任何层级的人都可以来往。
只是在不是一个层级的人交往中，
要宽容。
有时也要装糊涂，
因为你说了真话，
他们也是听不明白的，
太认真反而不好。
You can associate with people at every level of society. When your circumstances differ, be tolerant. Sometimes you must pretend not to understand. Even if you tell the truth, they may not grasp it. Taking things too seriously can be unhelpful.
成年人了，
要少讲对错，多认利益。
社会中，
不是讲真理的地方，是生存谋生之处。
As an adult, talk less about right and wrong and pay more attention to interests. Society is a place to survive and make a living, not a forum devoted to truth.
打击敌人的最好办法是做好自己。
用事实碾压敌人的希望。
The best way to strike at your enemies is to do well yourself. Let the facts crush their hopes.
在斗争中，要受得了一时的委屈，
等机会，战胜敌人。
In a struggle, endure temporary injustice. Wait for your chance and overcome your enemy.
“无事”之原则：
吃饭，睡觉，练基本功。
The principle for having “nothing to do”: eat, sleep, and practice the basics.
不用想太多，
每天干正事。
吃好、喝好、睡好、守时，
准没错。
Do not overthink. Do worthwhile things each day. Eat well, drink well, sleep well, and keep regular hours. You will not go far wrong.
把平淡的生活变得生动有趣且丰富多彩，
这就是能力。
Turning an ordinary life into something vivid, interesting, and varied is an ability.
总之，
健康的身体、有益的知识和稳定的情绪，
还有充足的财富是好生活的基础。
要好好建设和维护这个基础。
让生活过得又好又长。
In the end, good health, useful knowledge, stable emotions, and ample resources are the foundations of a good life. Build and maintain them well. Let life be both good and long.
祖训
FAMILY SAYINGS爷爷说GRANDFATHER SAID
少吃一口，安定一宿。
Eat one bite less; sleep peacefully through the night.
爷爷说GRANDFATHER SAID
宁可不够吃，也不叫它剩下。
Better not to have quite enough than to leave food over.
爷爷说GRANDFATHER SAID
累了不干了，明天再说。
If you are tired, stop. Leave it until tomorrow.
奶奶说GRANDMOTHER SAID
看你那副嘴眼。
Just look at that face you're making.
奶奶说GRANDMOTHER SAID
财物清，怨何生？
When money and possessions are clearly accounted for, where can resentment arise?
爸爸说FATHER SAID
面条不是饭，女人不是人。
“Noodles are not a meal; women are not people.”
这句家族旧话的含义，见书末作者的解释。
For the family meaning of this saying, see the author’s explanation in the final word. 后记 / Final word
爸爸说FATHER SAID
想过好日子，
要靠你自己，
我只是生养了你。
If you want a good life, you must rely on yourself. I only gave you life and raised you.
爸爸说FATHER SAID
话到舌边留半句，
要爱护精神。
Leave half a sentence on the tip of your tongue. Preserve your energy.
爸爸说FATHER SAID
自己的就是最好的。
What is your own is best.
爸爸说FATHER SAID
多吃水果。
Eat more fruit.
爸爸说FATHER SAID
吃得香，
睡得好，
是福气。
To eat with appetite and sleep well is a blessing.
母亲说MOTHER SAID
紧睁眼，慢说话。
Keep your eyes wide open and speak slowly.
母亲说MOTHER SAID
一句话一百样说法。
There are a hundred ways to say the same thing.
母亲说MOTHER SAID
没吃过猪肉还没见过猪跑。
Even if you have never eaten pork, surely you have seen a pig run.
母亲说MOTHER SAID
指亲不富，看嘴不饱。
Relying on relatives will not make you rich; watching someone talk will not fill your stomach.
作者
THE AUTHOR
董利钢，1958年生，北京人。1978年在广空服役，1981年退伍回京工作。现居芭提雅，泰国。
Dong Ligang was born in Beijing in 1958. He served in the Guangzhou Military Region Air Force in 1978 and returned to Beijing to work after leaving the military in 1981. He now lives in Pattaya, Thailand.
我的座右铭
MY MOTTO修炼身心，完善自我。
中正平和，无为而治。
以逸待劳，细水长流。
Cultivate body and mind; keep improving yourself.
Be balanced, upright, and peaceful; let things take their course.
Stay rested for what comes; let a gentle stream flow far.
序
FOREWORD大家好，我叫董天慈。
我听过关于我的很多刺耳的评价，例如，我十几岁时，就听过：从小不学好，长大就会变成她那样。由于我从小学习一般，没什么特长，不会奥数，在中关村那个地方，很早就不可救药了。从几岁开始到十几岁，我对自己唯一的评价，就是上不了什么好大学。高中三年级，我第一次真的考了倒数第一。老师问我为什么上课老说话，我跟老师说，我不说话我就睡着了。
就在这样一个快要睡着的下午，我同桌戳了戳我，她说她的梦想是当大明星，她要考电影学院。她请求我帮她买一套报名表。我去到电影学院，报名表和招生简章一起销售，100元一套。我怕她填错，想多买一张表，人家不单卖，我把我仅有的200块钱都花了。刚出校门，她说不要了，她家长买完了。我怕浪费钱，把招生简章翻了好几遍，我报考了唯一不要求长相的专业，用铅笔写一遍，再用钢笔描一遍，把铅笔轻轻擦了。
次年，我在所有人的“啊？”声中，考取了北京电影学院。一瞬间，我从一个不可救药的坏孩子，变成了未来的大明星。我爸爸妈妈很高兴。我爸爸拎着我的行李走进我的宿舍，说的第一句话是“要是考上的人是我就好了”。引得宿舍里的同学们哄堂大笑。我妈妈总是跟别人说，没怎么管我，就是快乐的放养。我小时候确实没有过多的学习材料，在我考电影学院的时候，也没有报名任何的补习班。甚至是我背着家里人去的，我没有钱买复习材料，就在考试前，在学校楼下的书店借着看了一会儿备考书，题目就答上了。我记得几道大题有关毛主席诗词，我对毛主席诗词，是从小就熟悉。这些绝不是快乐放养的结果。
后来我加入了奥美，当时是一个不怎么容易进去的广告公司，我在那里披星戴月做了很多年广告狂人，从一个实习生做到经理。后又加入了两家创新药领域的生物公司，担任市场部负责人。目前是一名在西雅图的艺术从业者。
我36岁移民了美国，并高兴的告诉了所有人。我勤更新照片，也通电话给朋友们，让他们别惦记我。我刚来的时候很难，我连红绿灯都看不懂，这边行人的绿灯是白色的。我的脚欲行又止，眼睛紧盯着周围的人，才明白是该停下还是可以过马路。电插销也和其他国家不同，它有一头是大一些的，一头小一些，不仔细看很难分辨。我折腾了二十分钟，才把电饭锅通了电。我重新上了本科一年级，我积极回答问题，作业多数是满分。我们学校上厕所不用举手，也没人明明知道我不会这题，还叫我上去答。
尽管需要举手上厕所，还得上讲台上现眼，回答不出的问题，但我仍然喜欢北京。我出生长大在北京，我们一家三口，准确的说是七口，因为我们还有四只小狗，在那里度过了快乐的时光。我的爸妈还有那四只小狗是我最好的老师，他们从不站在高处指导我的青春，只是告诉我，他们相信我。亏得这些自由，让我有好奇心、探索欲以及不断从头再来的勇气。
我觉得一个人长大之后成为像我这样的人没什么不好的。上学不及格没有打败我，该读书读书，该毕业毕业，该结婚的时候结婚，该离婚的时候离婚。该抓住的抓住，该放手的放手。好的不多吃，不好吃的也吃点。还要多少智慧才算是智慧呢。能像现在这样我很知足了。
Hello, my name is Tianci Dong.
I have heard plenty of harsh judgments about myself. When I was a teenager, for example, I heard people say, “Misbehave as a child, and you’ll end up like her.” I had always been an average student, with no special talents, and I was no good at Math Olympiad problems. In a place like Zhongguancun, that made me a lost cause early on. From childhood through my teens, the only thing I believed about myself was that I would never get into a good university. In my final year of high school, I really did come last in my class for the first time. My teacher asked why I was always talking in class. I told her, “If I don’t talk, I’ll fall asleep.”
One afternoon, as I was about to doze off, the girl who shared my desk nudged me. She said her dream was to become a big star, and she wanted to apply to film school. She asked me to buy her an application form. At the film academy, the form came bundled with the admissions prospectus for 100 yuan. I worried she might make a mistake filling it out and wanted an extra form, but they wouldn’t sell it separately. So I spent the only 200 yuan I had on two sets. Just as I left the campus, she told me she no longer needed them: her parents had already bought a set. Not wanting the money to go to waste, I read the prospectus several times. I applied to the only program that had no requirements about appearance. I filled out the form in pencil, traced over it in ink, then gently erased the pencil marks.
The following year, to everyone’s astonishment—“What?”—I got into the Beijing Film Academy. In an instant, I went from a hopeless bad kid to a future star. My parents were delighted. My father carried my luggage into my dorm room, and the first thing he said was, “If only I were the one who’d got in.” Everyone in the room burst out laughing. My mother always told people she hadn’t supervised me much, just let me grow up happy and free. It’s true that I didn’t have piles of study materials as a child, and I never took any prep classes for the film academy entrance exams. In fact, I applied without telling my family. I couldn’t afford revision materials, so just before the exam I spent a little time reading a prep book in the bookstore downstairs at school, and that was enough for me to answer the questions. I remember several major questions were about Chairman Mao’s poetry, which I had known since childhood. None of that was simply the result of being left to grow up happy and free.
Later, I joined Ogilvy, an advertising agency that was quite hard to get into at the time. I spent many years there as an advertising workaholic, working from dawn until long after dark and rising from intern to manager. I then joined two biotech companies developing innovative medicines, heading their marketing departments. Today, I work in the arts in Seattle.
I immigrated to the United States at 36 and happily told everyone. I posted photos often and called my friends so they wouldn’t worry about me. It was hard when I first arrived. I couldn’t even make sense of the traffic lights: here, the pedestrian “green light” is white. I would hesitate before taking a step, watching the people around me to figure out whether to wait or cross. The electrical plugs were different from those in other countries, too. One prong was wider than the other, and it was hard to tell unless you looked closely. It took me twenty minutes of fiddling to plug in my rice cooker. I started over as a first-year undergraduate. I eagerly answered questions, and most of my assignments earned full marks. At my school, we don’t have to raise our hands to use the bathroom, and nobody calls me to the front to answer a question they already know I can’t answer.
Even though I had to raise my hand to use the bathroom and embarrass myself at the front of the class over questions I couldn’t answer, I still love Beijing. I was born and raised there. Our family of three—or seven, to be precise, because we also had four little dogs—spent happy years there. My parents and those four dogs were my best teachers. They never stood above me telling me how to live my youth. They simply told me they believed in me. Thanks to that freedom, I have curiosity, a desire to explore, and the courage to keep starting over.
I don’t think there’s anything wrong with growing up to be someone like me. Failing at school didn’t defeat me. I studied when it was time to study, graduated when it was time to graduate, married when it was time to marry, and divorced when it was time to divorce. I held on to what was worth holding on to and let go of what needed letting go. I don’t overindulge in what tastes good, and I eat a little of what doesn’t, too. How much more wisdom does it take to count as wise? I’m very content with life as it is now.
董天慈 · Tianci Dong
作者之女 / The author’s daughter
前言
PREFACE首先说，我的思想语录是随想随写，没有次序，也没有归类，而且有很多想法也许与其他思想类似或相同。这不奇怪，因为思想从实践中来，所以肯定会有相同的发现，谈不上谁抄谁的。
无论谁说出来的真理，都需要自己再思考、再实践，把它变成自己的东西，才有实用价值。因此，亲身经历和自己的认知非常宝贵，这是我写这语录的本旨。
First, these thoughts were written as they came to me, without order or classification. Many may resemble ideas expressed elsewhere. That is hardly surprising: thought comes from practice, so people are bound to make similar discoveries. It is not a question of who copied whom.
Whoever expresses a truth, you must think it through and test it for yourself, making it your own before it has practical value. Personal experience and understanding are therefore precious. That is why I wrote this collection.
跋
AFTERWORD写完了，也可以算是一本书了。这是我的一部分思想。但也不是很全面。因为没有归类，所以看上去有些随意。
其实在整理的过程中，也想过，有必要吗？现在信息那么发达，再说，还有古今中外的高人们已经写了不计其数的高论。但又一转念，这毕竟是我自己思想的流露。就像自己流失的岁月。也当在心里留下一点流浪的痕迹。
至于价值和水平，我认为只是认知问题，你没有共鸣、没有感受，只能说没有缘分。所以一切随缘。
说句大话，我看《论语》让别人吹得上天了，也不过如此。整篇没有几句有用的话。
好，不多说了。我就是这么想的。现在还在实践中摸索。有更多的话，且听下回分解。
2020年5月20日
Now that it is finished, it can be called a book. It contains some of my thoughts, though by no means all of them. Since they have not been classified, they may seem rather casual.
While putting them together, I did wonder whether it was necessary. Information is so abundant now, and great minds, past and present, here and abroad, have already written countless lofty works. But then I thought: these are, after all, the expressions of my own mind, like the years that have slipped away. Let them leave a small trace of wandering in my heart.
As for their value and quality, I believe that is a matter of understanding. If they do not resonate with you or stir a feeling, perhaps the connection simply is not there. Let things be.
To make a bold claim, the Analects, which people praise to the skies, seems to me no more remarkable than this. There are hardly a few useful lines in the whole thing.
Enough said. This is how I see it. I am still exploring through practice. If there is more to say, that can wait for the next installment.
May 20, 2020
写在最后
A FINAL WORD感谢慈儿把我的胡思乱想、胡言乱语编成了一本精美的书。
可惜了这么好的纸和油墨了。不过就算是拉动消费了。
爸爸说“女人不是人，面条不是饭”。意思是说，不要把生活的担子压在女人身上，男子汉要负担起生活来。
哈哈，就此打住吧。愿岁月静好，天下太平！
Thank you, Ci’er, for turning my wandering thoughts and ramblings into such a beautiful book.
A pity to use such fine paper and ink on them. Still, let us count it as a little boost to consumption.
Dad used to say, “Women are not people; noodles are not a meal.” What he meant was: do not put the burden of life on women. A man should shoulder responsibility for living.
Ha! I will stop there. May the years be peaceful, and may there be peace throughout the world.
文字与画，一起留下。
Words and pictures, kept together.
文字 · 董利钢
Words by Dong Ligang
插画 · Tianci Dong，作者之女
Illustrations by Tianci Dong, the author’s daughter
《悟真语录》· 中英双语精简本
Wuzhen: Reflections · Abridged bilingual edition